German Wedding Traditions and Etiquette – Complete Guide

Looking for wedding traditions in Germany? We’ve gathered the complete guide for German wedding traditions – including how they celebrate, gifting etiquette, traditional clothing, food and drink, and more.

Weddings are filled with unique traditions and festivities. Add to the celebrations with a memorable gift experience or a thoughtful gift.

To help you explore German traditions, this article is organized into:

Unique German Wedding Traditions

• Polterabend: The Polterabend is a pre-wedding tradition where guests gather to break porcelain dishes and other crockery. The loud noise is believed to drive away evil spirits and bring good luck to the couple. After the smashing, the couple is responsible for cleaning up the mess together, symbolizing their ability to work together as a team.
• Brautentführung (Bridal Kidnapping): In some regions of Germany, it’s customary for the groom to “kidnap” the bride before the wedding ceremony. The groom, along with his groomsmen, will arrive at the bride’s house and take her to a nearby pub or tavern. The bride’s family and friends then follow, and everyone celebrates together until the groom pays a ransom (often in the form of drinks or money) to retrieve his bride.
• Polterabend Tree: Another variation of the Polterabend involves the couple planting a small tree outside their home or venue. Guests bring ribbons, decorated with well-wishes and advice, and tie them to the tree. This symbolizes the couple’s growing bond and serves as a visual representation of the love and support they receive from their community.
• Kranz (Bridal Crown): In some regions, the bride wears a ceremonial crown or wreath, known as a “Kranz,” during the wedding ceremony. This crown is often made of myrtle, rosemary, or flowers and symbolizes purity, fidelity, and fertility. After the ceremony, the crown is hung in the couple’s home as a reminder of their wedding day and the promises they made to each other.
• Wedding Shoes Game: During the wedding reception, the bride and groom play a game called “Das Brautpaar auf der Bank” (The bride and groom on the bench). The couple sits back-to-back on a bench while guests ask them questions about their relationship. If the answers match, it’s considered good luck for the marriage.
• Brautstehlen (Stealing the Bride): In some regions, the groom’s friends may play a prank on him by “stealing” the bride during the reception. The groom then has to find his bride with the help of his groomsmen, often by completing tasks or challenges set by the bride’s friends.
• Wedding Car Decoration: It’s common for the couple’s car to be decorated with flowers, ribbons, and other ornaments after the wedding ceremony. The decorations symbolize happiness and prosperity for the newlyweds as they embark on their journey together.

Traditional German Wedding Attire

German wedding attire reflects the country’s rich cultural heritage and varies depending on the region.

• Bride’s Dirndl or Traditional Dress: In some regions of Germany, particularly in Bavaria and other southern states, brides may wear a dirndl as their wedding attire. A dirndl is a traditional dress consisting of a bodice, blouse, full skirt, and apron. Alternatively, brides may opt for a traditional white wedding dress, similar to those worn in Western cultures, adorned with lace, beading, or other embellishments.
• Groom’s Lederhosen or Traditional Suit: Grooms in southern Germany often wear lederhosen, traditional leather shorts typically paired with a white shirt, suspenders, and a vest. In other parts of Germany, grooms may opt for a traditional suit, such as a dark-colored jacket and trousers paired with a white shirt and tie.
• Bridal Party Attire: Bridesmaids in German weddings may wear dirndls or traditional dresses that complement the bride’s attire. 
• Accessories and Headwear: Traditional German wedding attire is often accessorized with symbolic elements and headwear. Brides may wear a floral wreath or crown, known as a “Brautkranz,” on their heads, symbolizing purity and fertility. Grooms may accessorize with a hat, such as a traditional Bavarian felt hat known as a “Gamsbart,” or a feathered cap called a “Tirolerhut.”
• Folkloric Elements: Some couples incorporate folkloric elements into their wedding attire, such as handcrafted jewelry, embroidered handkerchiefs, or traditional footwear. These items add a touch of authenticity and cultural significance to the wedding ensemble, reflecting the couple’s heritage and personal style.

How to Say “Best Wishes” in German?

In German, to express “Best Wishes,” especially in a wedding context, you can say:

“Alles Gute!” It’s pronounced “AH-les GOO-teh!”

Need more wedding wishes? Here is our full article on Wedding Wishes in Other Languages.

German Wedding Gifting Etiquette


Gifting is an important part of German wedding culture. Here are some do’s and don’ts to keep in mind:

Do’s in Gifting:

• Consider Giving Money: In Germany, it is customary for guests to give money to the bride and groom for their new life together instead of traditional gifts. This is a common practice due to the absence of gift registries in German weddings.
• Gifts at the Wedding Reception: Guests can give gifts at the wedding reception, and there is often a gift table where guests can leave their presents for the couple. It is recommended to choose gifts that come from the heart and are thoughtful, such as items related to the couple’s interests or future plans.
• Respect Cultural Traditions: Understanding German gift-giving customs and etiquette is essential. Germans appreciate careful planning and predictability, so it is advisable to adhere to these cultural norms when selecting gifts for a German wedding.
• Be Thoughtful and Personal: When choosing a gift, consider the couple’s preferences, interests, and needs. Opt for gifts that reflect your knowledge of the couple, such as items related to their hobbies or something they can enjoy together. Personalized and thoughtful gifts are highly valued.
• Follow Wedding Customs: Respect the wedding traditions of the country, such as giving money instead of physical gifts, and be mindful of the cultural significance of gift-giving in Germany. Adhering to these customs shows respect for the couple and their cultural background.

Don’ts in Gifting

• Avoid Surprises: Germans generally do not appreciate surprises, either in business or personal life. It is best to avoid unexpected or spontaneous gifts, and instead opt for more predictable and planned gift-giving.
• Don’t Give Overly Expensive Gifts: While Germans appreciate thoughtful and personal gifts, overly expensive or extravagant gifts may be seen as inappropriate or make the recipient uncomfortable. Focus on the sentiment and meaning behind the gift rather than the price tag.
• Avoid Alcohol if Unsure: If you are unsure whether the couple or their family drinks alcohol, it is best to avoid gifting wine or other alcoholic beverages. Opt for non-alcoholic gifts instead, such as gourmet treats or sweets.
• Don’t Forget to Remove Price Tags: Even if you give an inexpensive gift, it is considered polite to remove the price tag before presenting it to the couple. The focus should be on the gift itself, not the cost.

Tree Planting Ceremony 

Some German couples incorporate a tree planting ceremony into their wedding festivities. During this ritual, the couple plants a young tree together, symbolizing the growth and strength of their relationship. As the tree grows, it serves as a lasting reminder of their love and commitment.

Log Cutting Ceremony

In regions of Germany with forestry traditions, couples may participate in a log cutting ceremony as part of their wedding festivities. The bride and groom work together to saw through a log using a two-handled saw, symbolizing their ability to overcome challenges and work together as a team in marriage.

Wedding Cup Toast

Another charming tradition is the “Brautbecher” (bridal cup) toast. The couple shares a special cup, often in the shape of a loving couple or adorned with intricate carvings, filled with wine or champagne. They each drink from the cup, interlocking arms to show their unity and commitment to each other.

Conclusion

Celebrating weddings in Germany goes beyond vows and rings. It’s a time to honor love, cherish family, and embrace timeless traditions.

Weddings are imbued with cultural richness and meaningful rituals. Enhance the festivities with an unforgettable gift experience or a thoughtful gift. So, here’s to a traditional way of celebrating weddings!